RETURN

I have a choice today to be Holy Spirit filled or myself filled. It’s a no-brainer in my head, of course I want God to lead me and to be fully surrendered to my Lord Jesus Christ, but then I get out of bed. And it’s past 6am so there’s no time for a deep meaningful quiet time I’m already behind for the day. Excuses. Whispers. They say I live out what I truly believe not just what I say I believe, my actions speak louder than my good intentions, then I must think it’s all on me - no one has time to care. I’m in charge of my life and I better protect myself from all the a--holes and idiots out there who don’t care about me and want to take advantage of me and my family. Lies.

But God. God is here with me. He hears. He cares. He waits. He loves me no matter what I do or say today, or what I don’t do or say. Be with God. Listen. I have a choice who I’m listening to today and I’m pretty tired of listening to me. My plans and expectations are exhausting and never-ending and never done quite “right”. Bebo Norman sings, “I’m so tired of it being about me.” Tired. My friend Michael Dye spoke frankly to my heart and said, “It’s time to kill the bitch, Monique.” Perfectionism breeds hopelessness and strangles joy. Don’t let the Devil win anymore. I return to my Savior, my Redeemer, my Lover of my soul. “Oh, Father, forgive me! I did it again.” Forgiveness covers me as I’m held in the bosom of my Daddy, my Abba. Receive. I want to be vulnerable and fresh and alive with Christ’s Spirit. Live wildly for the Lord. So I will return often to His well of never-ending grace and love, and drink of Him throughout my day. His thoughts are higher than my thoughts. His ways are higher than mine. May I believe God and live.

In His loving arms,
Sister Monique

“Wake up little girl. There’s a song to sing inside you. Wake up little girl. There’s a dance within your heart. You’re a miracle and all the world will someday want to know you. Wake up little girl, look inside and find True Love.” By Janet Planet